转贴--囧囧有神——吐槽贴,TB上的那些翡翠神器(编辑完毕)
纯粹纯粹滴转贴,来自百度贴吧,觉得好好笑,转过来大家开心一下!以前发过两次吐槽贴,关于那些囧囧有神的雕工,哎…………最近又去看了几页,真是没有最囧,只有更囧,每一天都在挑战大伙儿的审美底线啊………………话不多说,上图。我发图没啥逻辑顺序,随意发,各位随意看。1、据说这是美人鱼……………………我对那浮肿的马眼形脸,以及怀孕般的腰身,以及**的手势………………表示理解无能。我认为这是对和田玉某名家的美女系列的失败模仿…………没有金刚钻别揽瓷器活儿,出来就是四不像。可惜料子了。
2、据说这是踏雪寻梅。梅花是有了,雪没看见估计全化了。美女呢???美女呢???我只看见一位头大身小的观音姐姐啊………………连持梅花的手势都和净瓶观音一样样的。您这是请观音姐姐友情客串的吗????又一位糟蹋料子的师傅,这黄翡虽然薄,您做个平安π不行么?没有雪花棉,就别挑战这个题材………………![](http://fujian.giabbs.com/data/attachment/forum/201205/03/213016rpgohyo2mturgrry.jpg)
3、据说这是仕女头我觉得像CSI(犯罪现场)里面那种被分尸看下来的头颅,还是血淋淋的新鲜的头………………多么精致的雕工,头发分毫毕现,眼神直勾勾地盯着你,仿佛在说:我死得好冤啊!![](http://fujian.giabbs.com/data/attachment/forum/201205/03/213046rmr7grmp67r7rbgl.jpg)
4、据说这些都是佛爷……………………我已经无力吐槽了,我只能说,有这些料子,磨点珠子也行啊,别糟蹋“佛”这个字了………………我更好奇的是,谁会买来戴???![](http://fujian.giabbs.com/data/attachment/forum/201205/03/213152hqku6qq6jjiqqiiu.jpg)
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5、据说这也是仕女头………………卖家是有名的,雕工是精湛的,师傅是用心的,料子是水灵的………………可是,出来的成品怎么就那么让人纠结呢?是我眼睛出问题了吗???这是仕女,还是仕女她奶奶。老人家多有得罪,我们相信,您40年前绝对是位美女!
6、据说这也是踏雪寻梅………………料子真的不错,冰冰透透。可是可是,您就不能请个好点的师傅???这张脸她是美女的脸吗????那奇特如小丑帽的发型,那络腮胡子般的鬓角,那成龙都比不上的大鼻子,那眼那嘴那短脖子????您告诉我说这是踏雪寻梅的美女????![](http://fujian.giabbs.com/data/attachment/forum/201205/03/213317zzzc2a9cccscz8ce.jpg)
7、据说这是美人鱼………………说句良心话,这半圆形的带黄皮的料子是真的不错的,也挺大个儿,可是这混搭的雕工实在让人欣赏无能。背面看,这美人坐在一个球上,还长了翅膀。正面看,这美人有木偶般的双臂,手肘还是直角哦!观音姐姐的严肃的脸,唐朝仕女的高髻,人鱼的肥厚的尾巴………………我,我,……………………我不承认这是安徒生笔下美丽的人鱼公主,这货是长翅膀的妖怪啊!![](http://fujian.giabbs.com/data/attachment/forum/201205/03/213411959vq90t5dbt7cs5.jpg)
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[align=left]8、据说这些都是人鱼哦!
这货是美人鱼???这货不是穿了鱼尾装的耶稣吗???证据1、他露出了肚脐眼儿。证据2,他走哪儿都有光环在头顶啊!
这货是美人鱼???不是穿了网袜,戴了手套的………………夜店辣妹?
不是打了绿光,进了鱼缸,就是美人鱼了………………PS:外国人鱼采贝壳,中国人鱼举祥云???
这货是美人鱼???我以为是龙宫里面的门神呢…………只是雌激素吃多了,男人长了女人的胸。
这货是美人鱼????我觉得是观音姐姐披散了头发客串表演抛球呢。不错不错,一般人只会抛2个,专业人士才能一次抛3个。不过观音姐姐不专业啊,您这表情不到位,怎么还是一副普度众生的慈眉善目呢??您这鱼尾巴装拉链都开了啊,小心掉下来!
据说这货也是美人鱼。好吧,其实是观音姐姐的头 + 敦煌飞天的手势 + 鱼尾巴。最新混搭风![/align]
9、奸商神马的最可恨了。
这明明是脏得不行的料子,非说是木那雪花棉,非要搞成踏雪寻梅,还要卖几千块哦!
这个我就不说啥了,不知道盗了哪家的图,哎………………还真有人上当买。别给河南人民抹黑了,让广大河南同胞们情何以堪………………10、哎,又一个失败的踏雪寻梅………………头大身小的比例,苦大仇深的脸,求求师傅,别糟蹋料子了………………![](http://fujian.giabbs.com/data/attachment/forum/201205/03/213709rjo3zx3cyy3wjbjy.jpg)
11、这个号称“美人鱼”的题材我已经不知道说啥好了…………
看背面,好像是一个贵妇,穿着连帽子的斗篷,和几条蛇嬉戏。——————天啊,这是什么剧情????好吧,这可能是喜剧片。
看正面,吓死人啊,这活生生的恐怖片啊!!一双妖怪的手死死搂住了一个丰腴的妇女!女人在大叫救命!那条鱼尾巴是怎么回事???难道人鱼是妖怪,缠住了这个女人?12、来一组浪费料子的,看了有没有欲哭无泪的感觉?![](http://fujian.giabbs.com/data/attachment/forum/201205/03/2137122kfv2kzfikb279tk.jpg)
多美好的黄翡料子,水润,干净,鲜艳!但师傅这美人雕得………………说抽象吧,多么栩栩如生又坚挺的胸…………说写实吧,哪个美女有这种“腰比腿长”的比例???更别提那土气的卷发和大饼脸………………
据说这也是美女的头???这难道不是一个发迹线后退秃顶的,隆鼻失败的,人妖????
这个题材据说是“画皮”哦!嗯,果然够创意,够吓人,坐等看谁买。
这条美人鱼要卖一万哦!多么好的料子,雕工吧,说不上好坏,只能说,很有风格,类似古希腊水瓶上面的画儿,以线条取胜。只是,这样不给力的雕工,还不如做个福瓜,这么好的料子,哎………………搞成现在这样卖给谁啊!!13、来一组让人出离愤怒的。各位吧友说说,这些东西,是不是挑战买家们的审美能力和智商?
这个雕工您说这是成品?头都是歪歪扭扭的。
这个,不解释…………无话可说。求求您有这料子干脆磨两个珠子吧,别让佛爷死不瞑目。
您说这是美人鱼??卖家您脸红不红???这货明明是穿越的妖怪!人首鱼身,还梳了郭富城的中分头!
您说这是观音姐姐???那我只能说观音姐姐脸被打肿了。14、我已经无话可说了。上次我发过这个观音给大家看,当时我们就在想怎么卖得出去,结果,卖家豁出去了,钻石豪镶啊,吐血啊大家自己看吧,我真的………………崩溃了………………![](http://fujian.giabbs.com/data/attachment/forum/201205/03/214350w5jwctk35tgt74t3.jpg)
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GAME OVER
牢骚一下,第一次转这么多图滴贴,真是累屎人啊!喘口气儿,吃根冰棍儿去。木有功劳有苦劳呃,给点闪闪买根冰棍儿吧{:soso_e144:}
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